i would be lien in this very momment if i said i wasnt hurting because i truly am some things have come up an i jus cant don even kno how to explain..its takin alot of will power an strength to hold bac my tears an the fact that i kno once i start to cry i wont be able to stop...i jus dont get how someone who claims to love you soo much can hurt u soo bad an more than one time...it jus sucks ive been such a bitch to him lately an i have no choice but too....because its the only way i can protect myself from the pain that i have come upon im jus so tired of hurting an ifeel like i deserve so much more..so when he text me this morning telling me he was leaving for school i told him "I DONT GIVE A FUCK LEAVE ME ALONE" he hasnt text me all day..which in a since can be a very good thing...but its killing me cuz all i can think about is that fact that he probly already replaced me with her which hurts but at the same time ikno wut exactly she is going to fo through...i was jus hoping that maybe i could be the once to change him but i guess not. chelseas says men dont change until they are 40...i wonder if thats true im hoping when school starts i can keep my mind off all the bullshit...an when iget my number changed i wont be able tot alk to him cuz i refuse to give him my new number...i jus truly dont understand why love has to hurt so bad... jus sucks!
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